Dear flies, bees, wasps, mosquitoes, bumble-bees and spiders, what do you think about insect screens?

Fly: Insect screens? (Fliegenschutzgitter) Yes, very important! We flies do also have the right to existance. Otehrwise, we would not exist thus numerously. Pardon? Oh, yes, fly screens? Well, of course. It us much more comfortable to bounce from a net than from a glass pane. It can even be fun. Sometimes I sit down quietly on the fly screen and wait until somebody moves it and voilà I’m inside the room. But usually I get quickly bored in the flat as no other flies are there for playing and so I soon escape before I get discovered. Well, then: Have a nicccccccccccccccccce day!

Bee: Insect screens? I don’t need them. I hardly ever come inside a flat, there is nothing interesting for me to see. My beehive is much more comfortable. Sorry, no time for talking!

Wasp: Sneaky, evil stuff! Recently, I was crawling between the leftover pieces of cake on the garden table and did not think of anything bad and suddenly I was caught under a net cover. I was carried together with the plate into the kitchen and I was not released from my prison until the evening. When finally somebody lifted the cover and I quickly wanted to escape through the window there was another one of these stupid nets and before I was able to fly back the window was closed and I was trapped between net and pain. This has nothing to do with insect protection! And then the humans are wondering why I get so aggressive!

Mosquito: SSSSSSsssssssssSSSSSSSSSSssssssss So. Well there are these and there are those! These ones block the way to the inside and the other ones the way out again. However, I have adopted the fly’s trick to sit down on the fly screen and wait. Thus, one sometimes succeeds in entering the flat. SSSSSSsssssssssSSSSSSSSSSssssssss (Rollos)

Bumble-bee: Well, yes, finally a reasonable invention! How often did it happen to me that while I was flying for a walk over the pleasantly smelling flower pots on the window sill, I accidently entered the flat even though I didn’t want to. Once, somebody watched me doing so, caught me with a jam jar and exposed me just like in a zoo. Only when I was hardly able to hum and buzz any longer I was released. Why do humans put the most delicious flowers on the window sill? This is really too strange.

Spider: Do you mean these primitive webs which humans use trying to imitate me? I ask myself what they need it for as – as far as I know – they do not eat any insects. Moreover, the most important feature is missing: the glue. Thus, flies and mosquitoes can easily escape. Well, I don’t mind. I prefer spinning outsides, there is much more food flying around than insides.